Dear So and So: Bosnian Version, Part V

It's a Friday. The boys are at nursery. The dog is outside. The house is quiet. All is well with the world. So, happily ensconced in my temporary haven, I feel equipped to start my series of postcards directed at those who've caught my attention over the past couple of weeks.

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Dear Bosnian Drivers,

I'm pretty sure that driving on the pavement is not a part of your Driving Test or condoned by your authorities. Just wondering why you are all such fans of it.

Yours, forever surprised to come across an Audi coming towards us at speed with all four wheels on the pavement,
Fraught Mummy

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Dear Weather,

Got to say, you've been amazing this last week. The car told me that the temperature was 32C yesterday. It has been rather blissful. I'm just wondering how exactly is it possible that we can be having this balmy, blissful weather and yet still be having a forecast of snow for next week?

Yours, in for a bit of a shock if the forecasts are accurate,
FM

PS - got to ask, does this have anything to do with the fact that I packed away all our summer clothes last week and we are now all sweltering in thick winter ones?

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Dear Nursery,

I want to support you in every way you can. You do an amazing job with very little resources. However, when you ask me to contribute 12KM towards buying a TV and DVD player, I'm just not sure I can help. I think nursery should be for play and activities and don't want my boys watching TV there. They do enough of that at home (ah-hem).

So, I am sorry. Is there anything different I can donate the money towards instead?
FM

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Dear boys,

We made a great castle didn't we? I was ever so proud of it. Such a shame that it had to be thrown around within 5 minutes of us finishing it, and now I have to spend most of my mornings fixing it. Lets try to be a bit more careful with it in the future. Please?

Your not very crafty but trying hard mother.

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Dear Bosnian Entrepreneurs,

I'm pretty sure that there are already enough hairdressers, cafes and Driving Schools in Tuzla. Can I suggest if you want to start a new business you come up with one that doesn't have quite so much competition. An indoor playcentre or children's centre would be one idea, particularly with winter rapidly approaching. Or how about a cinema? I'd use them. A lot. Go on, someone must want to do it!

Yours, starting to worry about what I am going to do this winter when the weather gets bad,
FM

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Dear Outside Dog,

Chewing up The Economist was unforgivable. Chewing up The Economist with the Technology Quarterly supplement nearly made Dave spontaneously combust. You are on thin ice. Bear this in mind.

Yours with nothing to read in the bath,
FM

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Dear Bosnian authorities,

You need to sort the stray dog situation out. Not only do we have Outside Dog setting up camp, but now there is a puppy that wants to join her. I really don't want any more dogs, but can't turf them out onto the street again either. Surely you can get a programme of registration and sterilisation sorted, which will truly benefit the town.

Yours, wanting to remain a one dog owner,
FM

PS - sorting out the stray dog situation does not mean sending the hunters in either. At best that is a short term solution.

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Dear Bosnians,

This weather has been amazing hasn't it? We've enjoyed heading out for some impromptu picnics as well. The difference is, we pick our rubbish at the end and put it into the bins that are provided. You have an amazing countryside, which you are ruining by chucking the trash onto it. It isn't difficult to throw it in the bin, if you ever want tourists to start spending their hard earned cash in this country then you need to start doing it now.

Yours, fed up with picking my way over last weeks picnics,
FM

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Dear lady who lives down the road,

Thanks ever so much for your gift of the big yellow fruit that looks like an enormous pear but is hard. I have no idea what it is. How do I go about making it edible?

Yours,
FM

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Dear Random Imam,

I know my boys make a lot of noise and don't listen very often. But they are boys and that is what having a garden is for. Standing on the steps outside the mosque over the road and miming at me to smack them isn't really terribly helpful.

Yours, knowing there's some cultural differences that I ain't that keen to try and bridge,
FM

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Dear Tuzla authorities,

Your new square is really great. You've really done a good job there. We are looking forward to more afternoons spent lolling around the fountain and sitting on the benches under the trees. I have to point out though that to say this square will become one of the most visited in Europe is ambitious. There is a fair amount of competition out there and I'm not sure people will visit Tuzla solely to see the square. It isn't that exciting.

Did I say that I love the benches around the tree trunks?
FM

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Dear Municipality Heating,

I know the weather has been amazing this last week. But as soon as the sun goes down it gets pretty cold. We've been sitting around covered in blankets all evening. They are forecasting snow next week. Please, please, please can we have the heating on, and then we can choose whether to have the heating on or off.

Thanks,
FM

PS - I know I'm being a big old wuss here. Noone else seems to think it is that chilly.

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Dear Boys,

We did have a fab afternoon yesterday, didn't we? I have no idea why it all worked and everyone had such a great time when we didn't really do anything different to normal. But I loved it. You were both great.

Lots and lots of love,
Mummy xxxxx

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Have a go yourself. Head on over to Kat's at 3 Bedroom Bungalow in Crazy Town and sign up with all the other Dear So and So fans. And do try it, it is surprisingly therapeutic.

Or you can head over to Have A Lovely Time, who have very kindly let me write some top tips for visiting countries like Bosnia with kids.