Saturday, 6 March 2010

If I pretend not to notice then it isn't happening

We had an unexpectedly late night last night. Blame Risk. The taking over the world board game. Apparently we are all evil dictators at heart, and you can never trust anyone, they will always betray you.

But it was a late one. 2am late. The kind of late that I never do any more. Of course, the boys were up at 6am. Of course, it is my day to get up with them.

I'm in denial. The house has the detritus of a global domination campaign all over it; bags of crisps, cold pizza (homemade thank you very much), peanuts, bottles of beer. That classy sort of look. There is no noise from the boys. Actually, that isn't totally true. There is a sort of crisp crackling, muffled giggling. I strongly suspect that they are hiding in the cupboards having laid their hands on some forbidden ill-found goodies.

If I don't notice it then it can't be happening, right? What's so wrong with crisps for breakfast anyway?

21 comments:

TheMadHouse said...

I agree doesnt hurt every now and again!!

BNM said...

I was up early this morning too (5!) and Car then found some biscuits!!

Not very awake now BNMx

Sarah said...

You know those tiny little glimpses of a long ago, very fuzzy around the edges, quasi idyllic moments of childhood happiness people have ?

They are made up of those delightful, rare occurrences spent munching crisps for breakfast in a cupboard while the parents nurse their fatigue post party.

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Oh we have crisps for brekky regularly. And chocolate.

I don't remember going to bed at such a late hour, it was definitely a long time ago!

CJ xx

Emily O said...

Why do we do it to ourselves? A month or so ago I was still in bed with the baby (I have my excuse of sleepless nights!) and both boys were downstairs. Four year old climbed up to the cupboard and got Jammie Dodger biscuits for his and his brother's breakfast. I couldn't be cross really. It would never have happened in my house growing up!

planb said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
planb said...

Crisps, being vegetable based, are clearly one of their five a day. You are therefore an excellent mother feeding your children not only home-cooked pizza (most impressed) but also a most nutritious breakfast...

ps wine counts too (grapes are fruit...)

rosiescribble said...

I could never understand the damr Risk. I'll have to take another look at it now. There is nothing wrong with crisps or even chocolate biscuits for breakfast. If there is, then I am in major trouble. On several occasions I have left the biscuit tin within reach and had to ignore the fact that a six year old has removed the lid and helped herself!

Calif Lorna said...

Oh my goodness, we're exactly the same this morning. We watched John Cusack rescue his family from a world falling apart last night in 2012. This morning our living room looks like it's experienced a similar disaster.

Coffee, I'm starting with coffee.

nat said...

I do this sometimes, yet my paranoia cuts in strangled with a cord, choking, you know lol so I go and they see me and then go back to annoying me!

Owen said...

It's when they puke the hoovered-up peanut-pizza-crisp-beer dregs fusion all over the carpet that you'll know why the recommendation of a healthy breakfast is endorsed by nine out of ten estate agents.

Iota said...

Risk is a great game. Appeals to the world dominators in us all. Have you noticed how often the Middle East seems to be the focus of conflict?

Kate said...

Caffeine, caffeine and more caffeine. And then on with taking over the world - or at least conquering the piles of detritus from your previous campaign!

Heather said...

Exactly! I use the same technique myself. If i haven't seen it then i don't need to do anything about it!

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

MH - Exactly. They were loving it. I was getting peace and quiet. And if I didn't even know they were doing it... well, how could i stop it?

BNM - 5 is far too early. Especially for dealing with small children on a biscuit high. Not surprised you are tired!

Sarah - exactly my attitude. Half the fun is knowing that it isn't allowed normally too.

CJ - It was a long time ago that I did it too. It was fun though, worth it! World Domination is always worth it.

Emily O - See, if you just pretend that you didn't know about the jammie dodger biscuits then there is no guilt. Brilliant tactic if you ask me.

Plan B - Like your thinking. The kids didn't get any pizza, that was for us. They didn't seem to fancy it cold much. I on the other hand think cold pizza on a post party morning is delicious! PS - tragically no wine involved, only beer and I don't think I can count hops towards my five a day?

Rosie - dominate the world. Don't listen to the men, they talk shit, break their word and then sulk. I see the removal of obstacles by children as a method of learning through play. therefore it is a good thing. Ah hem.

CalifLorna - Coffee always the place to start. What is it with the beer, pizza, crisp rubbish that is just so unpleasant first thing in the morning. Yes coffee was the right place to begin (followed by pretending you haven't seen it in hope that someone else cleans it up?)

Nat - quiet always means that they are up to no good. But I figure eating crisps is something they can do on their own!

Owen - please don't bring that possibility to my mind, I can't take it!

Iota - it is good. Europe was our battleground. Although Afganistan caused many armies to come to grief too, which is somehow unexpected.

Kate - my tackling of detritus campaign was significantly better than my taking over of the world. I get tired and want to sleep half way through blitzing northern africa which is no good at all.

heather - you and i have very similar parenting techniques!

Modern Dilemma said...

Absolutely nothing at all! Mine steal biscuits from the jar if they have the slightest inkling mummy is still sleeping. The trail of crumbs always gives them away the cheeky buggers.

MD xx

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

MD - when do they grow up to know that we know when they are up to no good? That is going to make life a lot more difficult!

Mwa said...

The ignore-it-so-it's-not-real is one of my favourite parenting moves!

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

Mwa - me too. Do you think we could write a best selling parenting manual based on this premise?

Mamma Po said...

Risk was the downfall of many a weekend/evening when I was growing up. Despite being passive to the point of boring, playing with my 3 highly competitive brothers always resulted in bloodshed. I kid you not. I'm only surprised you made it to bed by 2am!

But I sympathise with the 6am start. When do kids start to understand the word 'hangover', sorry, I mean 'lie-in'??! xx

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

MammaPo - nearly bloodshed here. Lots of double crossing. I left the men to it, they carried on for hours!